Last week, Donn was sick, and I told him I refused to get it. Which meant, of course, that by Sunday my temperature was 102 and I had only a terrible croak where my voice used to be.
I spent the afternoon in bed, dozing in and out while catching up on my Hardy Boys books. I’m pleased to be able to announce that I am now not only familiar with the classic series, from my own childhood, but with the new and improved “modern and exciting” paperback series, and the ultra-new graphic novel versions. Which are kind of fun, really. I like the name graphic novel, as it sounds much more serious than “comic book,” which can be important for your self image even when you are high on antihistamines.
So Monday, I didn’t do much what with one thing and another. In fact, I don’t even remember the day, except after about 10 p.m. when I realized that I was hosting a baby shower the very next morning. Oops!
Ok, hosting isn’t exactly the word. It wasn’t at my house, and someone else got the cute confetti and pretty candles and flowers, and others brought muffins and scones and coffee cake and other munchies. But I was in charge of the event. Voice or no voice, the show must go on.
So I googled baby shower games, looking for something I could do at the last minute that didn’t involve diaper jokes. I know many of you find the game hilarious where you have paper nappies filled with mustard or relish or glutinous chocolate icing, but I just don’t get into those. For one, it reminds me too much of the reality of small children, and for two, it turns me off my food. And I like liking food, which might explain why these gym sessions aren’t having the desired results as far as me suddenly losing 20 pounds goes.
One site mentioned a nursery rhyme game. Perfect, I thought. I may not remember how to conjugate French verbs in the plus-que-parfait or where I put down the cordless phone, but I know my nursery rhymes! These little scraps of rhythm continue to take up plenty of space on my own personal hard drive, and no I don’t know why. Any ideas? Preferably not insulting?
So I sat down and shot out lots of ideas, like the hard-edged questions: How many bags of wool did the black sheep have? Why shouldn’t you put your baby to sleep in a tree? Yeah. This was gripping stuff. However, round about question 14 or so, I started to run out of steam. I googled nursery rhymes and found this fascinating site, guaranteed to take up even more valuable brain space. Yes, now you can waste even more time online learning the historical origins of popular rhymes.
My current favorite, and yes I have told this to everyone I know so far, is the origin of “Mistress Mary, Quite Contrary.” For those of you with brains devoted to the knowledge of how electricity works or simple calculus equations who may have forgotten this childhood favorite, the rhyme continues, “…how does your garden grow? With silver bells and cockle shells and pretty maids all in a row.” Pretty, right? Sweet, even. Nope. It refers to the reign of Mary I, aka Bloody Mary. The “garden” is the Protestant graveyard, which she did all she could to fill. “Silver bells and cockleshells” were instruments of torture, and the “pretty maids” were guillotines! Isn’t that fascinating? I love mixing medieval torture implements with soothing bedtime lullabies. No, actually, I do. This way, everyone involved gets something out of it.
The shower went fine, I think, although I have a feeling I talked too much in my croaky, croaky voice–something I tend to do when I’m not as prepared as I should be.
I’m mostly better now, stuck in that awkward in-between stage when you’re not really sick enough to be sick, yet lack energy to do anything useful. I absolutely hate this as I feel I am being really lazy, although I continue to race through mindless books. But on this typical Oregon spring day, when sun and shower mix it up constantly and my planters are full of daffodils and tulips, Elliot made the Perfect chocolate chip cookie. It is truly serendipitous! They look perfect; they smell perfect; they taste perfect. It was like little cherubs dressed in Nestle yellow (actually in the Trader Joe’s minimalist red logo) sprang full-formed from the oven door when he opened it to take them out. (Ok, maybe I should back off on the Benedryl, which is the only thing that dries up my nose) (And no, it’s not allergies. It had a definite beginning and will soon have a definite end, if I have anything to say about it.) So here I am, not at the gym, with little chunks of Paradise cooling on my counter. I wonder how long my self-discipline will hold out?
I’ll let you know. Later.
15 comments
April 18, 2008 at 5:17 pm
suburbancorrespondent
I cannot wait to check out that site.
April 18, 2008 at 10:26 pm
Jeana
The kids and I were just on that site yesterday! Isn’t it interesting? I do wish we could skip the string bikinis in the ads, since my kids are interested in it.
BTW, did you know that in the Wizard of Oz books, Dorothy is blond?
I told you I wouldn’t be able to let that go.
April 18, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Kit
I hope those cookies work a magic cure. I have been presiding over a sick room all week, so could do with some magic remedy to restore everyone to perfect health. Even the dog has been to the vet. I’m not allowed to succumb, but if I do I’ll be on to the Hardy Boys – I’ve only read one, that my son had, but he wants a detective birthday party and it’s only two weeks away, so perhaps I’d better start even if I don’t get sick!
April 19, 2008 at 1:56 am
Robin
Ooh, that sounds like a fab site. As a long-time folkie (folk music, folk process, etc.) I love stuff like that.
Hope the cookies worked some magic and got you feeling a lot better!
April 19, 2008 at 12:05 pm
Wacky Mommy
That is creepy, isn’t it? That’s always been one of my favorite rhymes — figures it would have a dark side. Like “ashes/ashes/we all fall down.”
Get better, babes, and I will too.
April 19, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Wacky Mommy
That is creepy, isn’t it? That’s always been one of my favorite rhymes — figures it would have a dark side. Like “ashes/ashes/we all fall down.”
Get better, babes, and I will too.
April 19, 2008 at 4:35 pm
allrileyedup
Ah, Bloody Mary. We can always count on her for a sick and twisted history lesson.
April 19, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Rebecca
Lots nursery rhymes have gruesome roots, which is sort of off-putting. But things start off for adults and then become children’s hand-me-downs and lose their sting…
Get better!
April 19, 2008 at 8:28 pm
Kelly @ Love Well
And that’s why I don’t read nursery rhymes to my children. They are creepy.
Isn’t there a French Christmas carol or lullaby that’s also gruesome? Something about children being eaten? I’m having flashbacks to my high school French class. Surely you must know, E.
April 20, 2008 at 6:24 am
Rebecca
As strange as it sounds, I think I’m going to have to use that site for homeschooling.
I have all my husband’s Hardy Boys books from when he was a boy. I believe he had hoped our kids would read and enjoy them but no one has any interest in them whatsoever.The graphic novels look much more interesting.
April 20, 2008 at 6:27 pm
Lonie Polony
I wish I could be as coherent and amusing as you when I’m tired/unwell:(
April 20, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Terri
I’ve heard the history of the “Mistress Mary” nursery rhyme before. I’ll have to check out that sight to learn the history behind some others.
April 20, 2008 at 6:34 pm
LIB
Elliott’s wife is so going to thank you someday!
April 21, 2008 at 5:04 am
cce
I’ll never enjoy a nursery rhyme in quite the same way again! Hoping those chocolatey chips help you on to wellness. And if you like kids lit/interesting versions check out the Classics Illustrated series which does Conrad’s The Secret Agent, Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Bronte’s Wuthering Heights, etc. in comic book form complete with the most amazinggggg art work. They’re kind of like cliff notes for the artistic.
April 24, 2008 at 5:11 am
nan
I told my kids about “ring a ring a rosies, pocket full of posies” being about the bubonic plague, and they thought it was SO COOL! The ring of roses is a circular rash. A pocket full of posies was supposed to protect you, and ashes, ashes, we all fall down… Well obviously! I will check the site out for more gruesome fun!